Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People Amy Sedaris

America's most delightfully unconventional hostess and the bestselling author of I Like You delivers a new book that will forever change the world of crafting. According to Amy Sedaris, it's often been said that ugly people craft and attractive people have sex. In her new book, she sets the record straight. Demonstrating that crafting is one of life's more pleasurable and constructive leisure activities, Sedaris shows that anyone with a couple of hours to kill and access to pipe cleaners can join the elite society of crafters.

You will discover how to make popular crafts, such as: crab-claw roach clips, tinfoil balls, and crepe-paper moccasins, and learn how to: get inspired (Spend time at a Renaissance Fair. Buy fruit, let it get old, and see what shapes it turns into); remember which kind of glue to use with which material (Tacky with Furry, Gummy with Gritty, Paste with Prickly, and always Gloppy with Sandy); create your own craft room and avoid the most common crafting accidents (sawdust fires, feather asphyxia, pine cone lodged in throat); and cook your own edible crafts, from a Crafty Candle Salad to Sugar Skulls, and many more recipes.

PLUS whole chapters full of more crafting ideas (Pompom Ringworms! Seashell Toilet Seat Covers!) that will inspire you to create your own hastily constructed obscure d'arts; and much, much more!

My Review:
I found myself smiling and chuckling aloud as I read through this book. Almost every page contains color illustrations and photographs showing comedian Amy Sedaris' wacky sense of humor. She tells the reader how to:

"make something that doesn't exist and nobody has ever thought of or even dared to dream about. An object so exceptional that it cannot be described by words because there is nothing of this earth to compare it to."

The inclusion of some chapters left me perplexed. "Crafting for Jesus" and "Making Love" appear to be inserted only for shock value. I did not find them at all funny.

There's a dress code for craft clubs which includes "elastic is good" and "no straw hats." It seems they cause fires!

Real recipes for fudge, cookies, and sausage are included. You don't need to be a crafters to enjoy this book.

Note: contains profanity.

Thank you to Karen Ukraine at Hachette Book Group for my copy.

Giveaway! I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence by Amy Sedaris

Amy Sedaris has appeared in several movies and television shows, and, with Paul Dinello and Stephen Colbert, a co-author of the novel Wigfield, and she co-wrote Strangers with Candy, the hit show on Comedy Central. She's also a regular on The Late Show with David Letterman. She lives in Manhattan with her imaginary boyfriend, Ricky, and her rabbit, Dusty.

Are you lacking direction in how to whip up a swanky soiree for lumberjacks? A dinner party for white-collar workers? A festive gathering for the grieving? Don't despair. Take a cue from entertaining expert Amy Sedaris and host an unforgettable fete that will have your guests raving. No matter the style or size of the gathering--from the straightforward to the bizarre--this volume provides jackpot recipes and solid advice laced with Amy's blisteringly funny take on entertaining, plus four-color photos and enlightening sidebars on everything it takes to pull off a party with extraordinary flair. You don't even need to be a host or hostess to benefit-Amy offers tips for guests, too! (Number one: don't be fifteen minutes early.) Readers will discover unique dishes to serve alcoholics (Broiled Frozen Chicken Wings with Applesauce), the secret to a successful children's party (a half-hour time limit, games included), plus a whole appendix chock-full of arts and crafts ideas (from a mini-pantyhose plant-hanger to a do-it-yourself calf stretcher), and much, much more!

My Review:
This may prove to be the most difficult book I've ever reviewed. It's a cookbook with recipes such as Split Pea Soup, Yogurt Spaghetti, Southern Fried Chicken, Yorkshire Pudding, cakes for special occasions, assorted drinks, as well as instructions on party planning, conversation starters for blind dates, how to give yourself a breast exam, the art of putting on panty hose, and gift ideas for the elderly. Also included are craft ideas such as how to make a needle wallet, a paper clip necklace, brick bookends, and several other useless items. Anecdotes are sprinkled throughout. This might make a unique idea for a quirky hostess gift. Note: contains profanity.

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The folks at Hachette Book Group are allowing me to host this book giveaway for five (5) copies!

Winners are restricted to the US and Canada. No PO Box mailing addresses, please.

I must have a way of contacting you, so be sure to leave your email address in code in your comment (Please do not ask me to look it up!)

I'll close the comments at 6 PM EST December 20th and pick the five winners. I will contact the winners via email to get their mailing information. The winners will have three days to respond. If I do not hear from them within three days, I will select another winner(s).

If you're interested, just say so in a comment with that all-important email address in code.
Example of email in code: you[at]yourmail[dot]com